Im back from a long hiatus. I just needed to let this whole parenting gig percolate in me for a while...just really let it brew inside me without trying to make sense of it, or find something meaningful or insightful.
Alot of days raising kids, it just feels like we are grinding it out...not in a bad way...just putting our heads down, having faith in our routines and our fledgling skills, and getting our kids through the day. Sometimes I feel like my husband and i are walking forward through parenting together, holding hands, but we rarely get to stop and look at each other...not until the end of the day. But we make it because we can feel each other's hand holding tight.
Anyways...
Something my mom said tonight about this whole parenting experience..."it really tempers a person." That hit home for me...not just parenting, but specifically for me learning to be a mom staying home with my kids. I looked up the definition of temper ( the verb)...and its to increase the strength and or elasticity of a substance by heating up, then cooling..metal, glass....I think that can be applied to being a parent. I feel emotionally and physically pulled and pushed and heated and cooled...and broken down to build myself back up stronger...well hopefully that is.
Im definitely not the same person I was three years ago. I have a tempered view of things. When I hear about a first time mom having a baby, its not just soft warm feelings i have for the baby anymore. My heart really goes out to those parents because they have a ton of hard and fast growing they are going to do...and nobody else can do it for them. I want them to stretch and strengthen and discover what they capable of when they dig deep.
