Day 1 (Part 2)

So I am done with Day 1. As I mentioned before I am reading Dr. Laura Markham's book, here is her website of Aha!Parenting if you have not heard of her before: http://www.ahaparenting.com/
I actually started the book over again today while I was breastfeeding my youngest daughter.  I love this book, and it is not a book to read quickly and then put away. I think I just need to keep reading it over and over again while my kids grow up just to keep myself in the right frame of mind.
So as I read through the book this time I'll mention specific parts that are Aha! moments for me.  The first one:
"Parenting isn't about what our child does, but about how we respond. In fact, most of what we call parenting doesn't take place between a parent and child but within the parent."

AMEN!! Wow this part really resonated with me. I read it a couple times and have been thinking about it all day today.  Our job is almost like a doctor's Hippocratic oath...Do no harm.
I finally realized, my daughter Charlotte is going to grow out of these frustrating behaviors...and I just need to work really hard to be as patient as possible, and set boundaries for her while she works through them.  She is not always going to run away from me or refuse to listen during every single transition of the day. Or not allow me to brush her hair or put her clothes on because she's decided she is not ready.  How I AS AN ADULT RESPOND TO HER BEHAVIOR IS WHAT DEFINES ME AS A PARENT, and will ultimately teach my daughter how to handle her own emotions.

I am really glad I read this part again today because it helped when Charlotte did not want to go to the park with me.  She actually tried to push me into another room and close the door to say "go away." She wanted to stay at home with her Grandma and play.  Now you're asking, why not let her? Because my husband and I know she needs to burn off energy, play with children her own age, and get her outdoors for fresh air.  Is it easy to go through yet another transition? No.  Is she worth the effort? Yes!   It actually took me a while to calm down after that, because it just really hurts to have your kid choose Grandma over you.  But I realized this issue is internal to me, and not something to do with Charlotte at all.  I don't want to regret taking it out on her.  So I kept my mouth shut, stayed patient and eventually calmed down at the park.

Goodnight everyone! Bed calls!