34: Paruntin'

I dont have a topic in mind, but I have alot on my mind. The oddity of parenting struck me today while thinking about friends with older children. Maybe there is a better word than oddity...not coming to mind though. Let me see if I can explain my thoughts. Especially as a woman I think alot about how life comes from life. For life to propagate life had to figure out how to continually recreate. A baby grew in my body and nourished itself from my body. Then my baby after birth grew and flourished by feeding from my body. So as a mother I feel very deeply like a creator and a provider.
Now with toddlers, and staying at home with them, I feel like a teacher and a provider. I give my time and invest a large amount of myself in raising them the best way I know how.
But watching Charlotte in the pool today floating around, chatting, wiping water off my face for me when I got splashed...I realized her otherness, her separateness...there is a huge part of her that has nothing to do with me. It will grow and develope, and I just get to observe. Wow... something of me is now something different and unique. 
So is parenting a job? A joy? A responsibility? A reward? A burden?  A duty? A gift? A path?
I believe trying to be a good parent is my gift to my kids, but it carries the weight of responsibility.
And its a path within a path. Its definitely a well worn path for many people in life where you really grow up. You understand on a deeper level sacrifice and love. You understand your parents and all parents better.
But parenting in itself is a path. Every age and stage is another step on the path...and feeling so much responsibilty for raising your creation and keeping them safe struggles with this idea that you have to set them free to be separate.
What a challenge as a parent to create someone so precious to you, care for, raise, and then let go.
Anywhooo...
The best part of my day? Sitting on the steps at the pool while Charlotte floated around, and chatting with a friend who has two kids of similar age. I love comiserating ( sp?) with fellow moms...its not complaining, it really does help. It helps you feel like you are not alone. Plus this friend is super chill and down to earth.
I love Winters where we live and all the great kids and parents that I continually meet! And I love Treehouse where Charlotte goes to school...what a great community of people.